20 Phrases Challenge

Alright, I am starting a new writing challenge. I know I haven’t finished the last one, but I feel that it would be better if I started something else. I might go back to it at a later date. So this challenge will consist of 20 phrases and I will make sure that each post relates/contains the phrase of that day. Here is the list of the phrases:

1. I’m out of my mind feel free to leave a message.
2. My anger management class pisses me off.
3. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
4. I don’t know karate but I do know crazy and I am not afraid to use it.
5. Do not disturb already disturbed.
6. Sarcasm is only one of the services I offer.
7. Where’s there’s a will…I want to be in it.
8. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
9. You’re just jealous because the voices talk to me.
10. I want to die while asleep like my grandfather, not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.
11. Sometimes I aim to please, but mostly I just shoot to kill.
12. A penny for your thoughts. A dollar if you flash me!
13. I am a Nobody. Nobody is Perfect. Therefore I am Perfect.
14. I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
15. Buckle up. It makes it harder for the aliens to snatch you from your car.
16. People who say you can’t buy happiness just don’t know where to shop.
17. Cancel my subscription — I don’t need your issues.
18. Madness takes its toll — Please have exact change.
19. I’m Not 50 — I’m $49.95 Plus Tax.
20. (On the back of a motorcycle rider’s t-shirt) If you can read this, then the bitch fell off.

Credit for the Challenge goes here: http://ghostflowerdreams.tumblr.com/post/8754336797

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